Thursday, October 16, 2008

.. its my story

so hi guyss..
basically i have a thing of blogging when i feel sad so here it is another depressing blog but like im gunna be open once again and say what i feel.. who knows maybe sum1s going throught the same thing..

i always remember the good old days.. wen ur youung and wen ur always happy u no.. we made a fuss back then over the tiniest things like getting a bruisee or sumthin silly like that and everything was just great.. happy family, and all.. then time passes and u start growing up.. u start noticing thing u havent ever noticed before, and bruises are the least of ur worries.. u dont get bruised in the outside now but on the inside too.. u get to know tht people u think are simply amazing are just after sumthing else and use u to get what they want.. they act more babyish than ever wen they do that may i add.. family wont be so happy anymore neither.. stress at school, bad influence.. going horrible in exams because u try to be "cool" and then relise that after all you are the one whos going to go through all that studying and getting shouted at by your parents not the ppl that influenced you into not studying.. and everything piling up on eachother! then wen u go to breathe sumwer else and just relax, he cums with all his might and breaks u more than ever.. he breaks u into bits and pieces..and u slowly fall coz u wont have anywer to go.. even though u know Jesus is there u take the easy way out and go to the evil one.. and he makes u do silly stuff and start gossiping and becum sum1 u wud have never dreamt of being..
people just come.. do there job, wen theyre ready leave and just forget u! literally forget u and dont care about u, atleat they got wat they wanted.. i want to escape, i just want to escape and go somewhere else.. i no Jesus is there i relee do no hes there and i no that hes goin to help me go through this and im going to work at this because im not going to let him win.. im gunna let Jesus win!
and u no wat.. i got to know the most terrible news.. the most horrible news ever and the thing was it wasnt even from the person tht was actually gunno do it.. it was from his friend.. and i cant believe it coz this person i loved so much and never thought he wud have kept somthing so serious from me just did.. and wen i confronted this person he didnt even seem worried.. he told me all calmly and it made me even more angry.. he kept talking like he knew i knew.. and i was so angry i just left u no.. and went enjoying himself..and i felt so betrayed by this person, RELE betrayed.. cause then ppl just judge u and ur the one thts gunna get hurt by all the judgement u no not the person coz the person dus not give a shit! [confusion much!] and the person is gunna hurt sum1 rele dear to me and u no im so sick of all this.. people put so much responibility on me that i hardy have time to solve my own problems! it so so stupid and im rele sick of it!

guys thts all..
im going to trust in Jesus coz i no he will get me through this!

The LORD is my light and my salvation whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life of whom shall I be afraid?

When evil men advance against me to devour my flesh, when my enemies and my foes attack me, they will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,my heart will not fear;though war break out against me,even then will I be confident.
One thing I ask of the LORD,this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple.
For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle and set me high upon a rock.
Then my head will be exalted above the enemies who surround me; at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of joy; I will sing and make music to the LORD.
Hear my voice when I call, O LORD; be merciful to me and answer me.
My heart says of you, "Seek his
face!" Your face, LORD, I will seek.
Do not hide your face from me, do not turn your servant away in anger; you have been my helper. Do not reject me or forsake me,O God my Savior.
Though my father and mother forsake me,the LORD will receive me.
Teach me your way, O LORD; lead me in a straight path because of my oppressors.
Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,for false witnesses rise up against me, breathing out violence.
I am still confident of this:I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.

Psalm 27.

Love and Blessings

Krissy x

Thursday, August 28, 2008

So my internet isnt workin so im writin it on word and then ill post it on my blog..

So at the moment i am just so confused.. not in a good mood thats for sure. I jus had worship workshop and i didnt feel anything today... its like i felt in such a bad mood and i had alot of pain and grief inside me!
Lately i am getting to know who my true friends are.. really painful and it just sucks! I felt this pain inside of me and just wanted to burst out crying really but i obviously couldnt! I felt like i dont even know who my friends are anymore.. as in i still have really good friends and stuff and i love them to death but the peole i thought where my bestest friends just arent.. you know? I just really think these people need prayers!
I cant express how sad im feeling today.. its just like i am not myself. I feel kind of lonely and stuff even though i know theres God near me its just i cant truly connect today maan! I feel like im really depressin everyone reasding this but like not in the best of moods so w/e!

This is the poem i was suppost to read in worship but didnt:
You are beautiful
You are jesus christ
You have lived for us
And you have even died

What you did for us
Its amazing lord
You created the world
Each living thing with thought

Everything i see
I admire so
From the amazing sea
To the mountains with snow

You have moulded us
Everyone with care
Everyone with love
Every him and her

Jesus shine through me
I want to be like you
In every way i could
In everything i do

So thankyou jesus christ
For creating me
And the beautiful world
For everyone to see

Its not so good but like i dont know i was randomly inventing songs in my head and these words where coming out and they sounded quite good together so i jotted them down and voilaa..

So every time i go to worship workshop i always get inspired by peoples opinions and today two people got really inspired by butterflies and one girl compared butterflies to us.. she said like you know butterflies carry pollen from one flower to another and new flowers grow.. its like us sharing Gods word with other people and the people become renewed Christians in a way.. dont know if i explained it well but oh well!
Then alot of people did really nice art stuff like drawings, collages and then people also wrote really nice poems and really amazing songs.. they where all really exquisite in there own way and i really like them all.. so thanks to everyone for sharing everythin was totally inspiring!

Now for all those who know me definately know that like when im with peole i know, im not shy at all but when it comes to people i dont know so much i get really shy and thats one of the reasons i didnt read my poem in worship.. most of you are probably saying like uwijja mhuxx her fault and stuff but like i know its my fault and stuff and i am really trying to overcome this thing but its like its so freakin hard.. when like i talk during the workshop i always end up shaking or something and that really really annoys me maa.. its like i try to stop it but i cant.. and like people say cause u wer scared and stuff but id actually be feeling quite comfortable but it occurs naturally and thats when when i start to get abit ekk cause ill be tryin to stop and it doesnt work.. and yes im quite cautious on like what people think and thats another thing i need to overcome kind of..
So like last time i was really happy cause like we had a youth mass and like after me sue simone and kay decided to go to the festa.. and like me and sue where walking on the road and singing all the Y4J songs and the thing is at that moment i really didnt care what people thought and i felt so happy. Its like i felt this boost u know.. and it felt so great and a really big acheevement u know..

So this post was actually quite long..
Im off to read it!
Hope i didnt totally bore u but i really needed to let go u know!

Love & Blessings

Kristina xxx

Friday, June 27, 2008

Aaaah! SUMMER! :)

Heeeeeyy! :)

Its Kri & This Is Her 1st Blog This Summer!!!!.. and guess wat.. I just woke up and its 1! :O!!! ma im sucha LAAAZYY BONEEE! :P..

So yest went to exiles wiit val kim micki dawn & kay [luuu alll! :)] and wen we wer there we met laa lariij donaa larissa beev daan dreew & all the ppl of y4j aax ill never stop!! xD Insomma it was relee gr8 & fun & hectiic & hillarious! Thxx so much guys 4 makin my 1st day of summer amaziiin :D Then me & miic & val decided 2 jump in wit our shiirts... yess we r crazy and randoom :).. we actually floated wit em! they wer like lifejackets!! :O :) Theen we went to amigoes but daawn had 2 leaave! :(.. me and kaay took a kinniee [i hadnt taken it in aagees! :P] & d most amaaaaziiin fajita everrrr! :)

Theeen we wer leaavin nd dreew showeed us thiis thing he did wiit a polee! :O he like carried himself onn it! it was rle cool! :P

Noow 22daii i hav freakiin ballet & its rele rele rele rele rele rele gettin on my nerves cuz i cunt go shoppin or swimmin wit my friends and its frm 4-9.. and even tomorro i hav 2 cum after d youth mass 2 meet my friends aaxi hav my show! =/ :@ uwijja tht shows itll soon be oveer! yeey :P
Dunt get me wrong cuuz i releee laaav danciin and ballet but it gets rele annoyiin wen u hav everydaay and u hav 2 miss things u luuv 4 it! uwijjaa

guyss im off aax my bro is bbeiin an ass! :P

Laav Yeh All!
Ill blog lateer i promisee! xD

God Bless

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

MyDaddiDidDGorgeousMoon2nite! MoonsInspirePpl!

Heey Beautiful People!

Soo yess.. Krissi is bloggin.. AGAIN! xD

So I am feelin amazingly extremely Greaat!
I will tell you my story! =P

Soo i was studyin physics on my room on the roof! I decided to take a break and said instead of msn im goin on my roof[[outside as in]]!
When i went outside to my surprise i saw the beautiful moon.. I found it amazing maan! I was like really thinkin and after said.. "Omgg.. I can't believe my dad actually created that amazin moon!".. I was so like happy and i started danciin and singiin 4 no reason! [[yes im a very random girl xD]] I then decided like to talk to God u noo.. I told him how hurt i felt and how sick i was of my friends calling me names and like abandoning me and like I felt sum1 tellin me "Its Gunna Be Oki!".. I like told him everythin and it felt sooo good like completely opening to him and stuff.. Like i was really myself and now like im gunna be confident u no and not let ppl do wat they want with me cuz it hurt me too much and i dont want 2 be the goody goody anymor that stays for everything i want to be strong and i want ppl 2 like me for who i am not for who i used 2 pretend 2 be just to be liked!!

Like i remember b4 i used 2 hang wit these ppl like tht had rele bad habits.. smoked.. got drunk every saturday night and stuff..sworee[and wen i say swore.. they swore!] and i used 2 pretend 2 be cool u no.. I mean i never swore or smoke or drank but like sumtimes i used 2 be tempted kinda.. but i never did thank God! I then like tried tellin the guy 2 like try 2 stop swearing and stuff imma like for nothin i told him.. he kept getting even worse till this day! He's always in my prayers though.. then like summer passed i didnt meet these people again! Thank God again :)..

Also today there was this girl in my skul.. shes really sweet and always hyper and with a smile on her face.. she cares sooo much about the people around her.. I then get to no that her mom wasnt one of the best moms.. she used 2 hit her and stuff.. She[my friend] then decided to run away and came to live in pembroke with her family.. She is now nearly always in court because of her mom.. Even though she is so bruised from inside she never ever shows it and aways tries to make the people around her happy and i think this is so amazingly beautiful! The girl really needs our prayers so please pray 4 her!

I think thats enough for today!
I really needed to zvoga!

Tnx 4 readin my blogg! xD
A hugee tnx 2 saraa and agaiin 2 laa 4 always bein there!

I Laav Yu All Guys!

God Bless Yu!


Ps. 55 Days Guys!

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Hii Gorgeous Pplz x ]

Hope u all doin fine!

So im like in a bloggin mood 2day! *Gleeee*

So yesterday was the MOST AMAZIN MEETIN EVERRR! =']

An extraordinary experience.. Tnx 2 Maria Vadiaa! :)

Its like she helped everyone tht day man! Ekk i felt God a rele lot in my heart and stuff and it was so nice 2 feel his presence in my heart.. like i felt so many doors opening.. i felt like so happy yet so scared.. i felt so confused yet so positive.. i felt like someone up there really does love me.. really does have a plan for me.. really does care about me.. SOMEONE ACTUALLY DIED FOR ME!! Its just such an amazin feelin u no! All those mixed feeling wer like "whoaaa"! :O

I mean like even tho i chose 2 follow God sum ppl disliked me.. sum ppl avoided me.. it was all SOOO WORTHEDD! I WILL NEVERRR EVERRR REGRET ANYTHIN.. Neverr.! :)

And like even tho ive been like hurt lately cuz of ppl gossipin and stuff.. so many people have been there for me!

A shout out to Laa.. Niix.. MariaAngela.. Zo.. Suee.. Anzie for really really helpiin me! Tnx guyss soo much! :)

It feels so great noin tht ppl r there 4 u! :)

Relee thankful 2 hav such amazin friends xD
Im Off!
Ill Try Blog Laterr!
Keep On Prayin 2 D Lord Who died or Us Guys!
Luv Ya All!
Kri_X" quality="high" width="180" height="210" name="scroll" align="middle" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="" />">Tim Hughes Lyrics">Everything Lyrics

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Hii agaiin! xD

Hope U R All Okii :P

Soo like lately i hav been thinkiin lots about friendss and exams and stull like tht :S
Its relee ekk how u think a person is sum1 wen the perspns not! I mean sumtimes u thiink like u found the most amaziiin person ever wen the person is rele a backstabber and stuff.. i mean i think these ppl rele need our prayers.. Imma like from these people u rele learn and stuff!
Hehe! So like guyys from these hurtful things remember u can always learn so always try be OPTIMISTIIC!:)


EXAMSSS!! .. Ohh d stress! =//.. But anyway atleast whilst ur studyiin ur learniin therefor becumin mor intelligent! :P Hehee.. Told u im optimistiic! xD

Hehe i wud also like 2 say tnx 2 Amy cuuz 2daii she rele rele helped me & stuff! :)

Like im gunna quote naqa! :P
Its like u no wen u hav stress frm exams and stuff.. Make sure yu try ur best and like even if ur best is a 50 laqwa u no ur doin ur best and laqwa God noos! :)

Okii so now im feelin like much better than b4! xD

I actually like bloggin! >.<

Anyways im off cuz like i need 2 keep on studyin! =P
God Bless Yu All! :)

Keep ur thrust in God strong guys! :D

Laav Yu All!

Ps: I Lav Yu Dawniiii :)

Monday, June 9, 2008

Hehe! It Randommm

Hiii Luvaaz x]]
So im in a rather random mood 2daii! =P

Well 2dai started out nbb but then became suckii[hah i hav my own words=P] but now its k!:D

Soo atmm im luuvin goo goo dolls [for those who duno no em theyre a bandd! ^^].. they hav liike d most amaziin songss! :O
Oh and im also luviin Tim Hughes! *Amazingness =']*

Hmm.. wat 2 say!
Oh Yees =//.. Soon Examsss! *stressfullness ='[*

Uwijja atleast tht means we gettin closer 2 summa!! OPTIMISTICNESSS! :))

I'd like to tell Kiim a very biiig tnkyu!
& Alsooo 2 myy mummi.. Lariiij Joo x]] iluu

Anyways Im Off! =P

I Hav 2 Slpppp! x]]

Laav Yu All!

May God Bless Yaa All! =]]